Written by Bill Simmons
SUMMARY:
Released by Ballantine Books and ESPN Books in 2010, sports journalist Bill Simmons lets his hyper-active commentary rip in a 735-page softcover analysis of the NBA. Overloaded with footnotes, Simmons begins with ‘The Secret’ of basketball (hint: unselfishness is a vital component). He tackles the Russell vs. Chamberlain debate; and then an era-by-era breakdown of the NBA’s evolution. Next up is his hypothetical ‘what-if’ scenario game where he imagines what likely might have occurred, had certain players had gone elsewhere; revised drafts and trades; and games that impacted the NBA’s future. Simmons also examines various ‘MVP’ controversies and offers his proposed corrections.
For chapters six through eleven, he literally rebuilds the Basketball Hall of Fame from the ground up, as if it were a pyramid. Starting at the bottom, players that Simmons deems worthy are profiled, as he gradually works up four levels until there is his ‘Pantheon’ of the NBA’s thirteen greatest players at the peak. Some players are profiled side-by-side, as Simmons compares, for instance, Charles Barkley vs. Karl Malone, Dan Issel vs. Artis Gilmore, and George Gervin vs. Sam Jones. Near the end, which Simmons dubs “The Legend of Keyser Söze,” he analyzes the NBA’s greatest squads in terms of dominance, including how the present-day salary cap would have impacted them. In “The Wine Cellar,” Simmons assembles an immortal team by cherry-picking players from their best seasons.
The finale is a 2009 sit-down chat he shares with Bill Walton re: life after basketball and the deep meaning of that ‘Secret,’ as how it pertains to their perceptions of Kobe Bryant.
REVIEW:
There’s no question that the verbose Simmons crams multiple books into one. His incessantly snarky humor alone is epic, as it even further permeates an unending stream of footnotes. Still, there are several refreshing stretches, such as the Hall of Fame player profiles, that are worth perusing. His flippancy (i.e. a footnote dig at George McGinnis’ hapless propensity for turnovers — or a reference to the 80’s NBA coach perms trend — straight from the ‘Mike Fratello collection’) is frequently LOL hilarious.
Yet, an unrestrained Simmons doesn’t grasp when to finally shut up or refrain from locker room-caliber profanities and icky analogies. His exuberant ridicule of Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Vince Carter, and Rick Barry, among others, is amusing, but even Simmons acknowledges that his bulldozer approach comes off pretty thick. There’s a few sexist jibes targeting the WNBA (plus a cruel dig directed at actress Bridget Moynahan) that makes one wonders why ESPN permitted such misogynistic putdowns to see print.
As gifted as a writer Simmons knows he is, his no-holds-barred ranting is easier to digest in far smaller bites. As seen in a collaborative format (i.e. 2018’s Basketball: A Love Story), where he is among countless other contributors, one can better appreciate Simmons’ sometimes golden insights, that is — when properly edited. The Book of Basketball is a great occasional resource, but the author’s grating super-fan ego over-indulges itself far, far too often.
ADDITIONAL FEATURES:
Black-and-white trading card-style images of players decorate the start of each chapter. Beyond an obligatory table-of contents, there is the author’s introduction and a brief foreword from Malcolm Gladwell. Simmons also includes acknowledgments, a bibliography, and a much-appreciated index.
BRIAN’S ODD MOON RATING: 6 Stars