SUMMARY: RUNNING TIME: 16:00 Min. (Black & White)
Directed and produced by Jules White off his brother Jack White’s script, this mid-1958 Stooges comedy co-starring Joe Besser is literally a scene-for-scene remake of an earlier remake.
Here’s the quick backstory: reworking their 1935 Pygmalion-inspired “Hoi Polloi,” Curly Howard’s last Stooges caper was 1946’s “Half-Wit’s Holiday” (also directed by White). Hence, White’s Besser footage filmed for “Pies and Guys” is tacked on the front end, as new actors replace ‘Quackenbush,’ ‘Lulu,’ & ‘Sedlitz.’ It isn’t clear if Emil Sitka’s “Half-Wits” footage was recycled, or if he simply re-filmed his role as the butler.
Snooty rival professors Quackenbush and Sedlitz make a financial wager whether or not Quackenbush can reform dim-witted plumbers Larry, Moe, & Joe into refined gentlemen. With support from his glamorous blonde assistant, Lulu, Quackenbush tutors the less-than-astute Stooges on mathematics, reading, and dignified table manners, etc.
A big society party is the climax where the Stooges must prove their newfound sophistication to their fellow guests. Yet, a melee ensues once kleptomaniac Joe and his fellow Stooges revert to their old and gooey pie-throwing ways.
Moe: Moe Howard
Larry: Larry Fine
Joe: Joe Besser
Professor Quackenbush: Milton Frome
Miss Lulu: Greta Thyssen
Sappington: Emil Sitka
Professor Sedlitz: Gene Roth
Mrs. Smythe-Smythe: Symona Boniface
Mrs. Gotrocks: Helen Dickson
Countess Shpritzvasser: Harriette Tarler
Party Guests: Judy Malcolm, Victor Travers, Wanda Perry, Barbara Slater, Al Thompson, Johnny Kascier, & Mary Forbes
Additional Party Guests: Uncredited
Notes: Besser takes a pie to the face early in the finale and then inexplicably doesn’t appear again. It’s clear that this episode’s vintage ‘Larry & Moe’ pie-throwing party has been lifted from elsewhere – in this instance, “Half-Wit’s Holiday.” In an odd visual early on, Frome & Roth tower over the Stooges, as if Moe, Larry, & Joe, by comparison, are practically dwarves. Lastly, here’s a bit of Stooges trivia: Moe’s wife, Helen, had first suggested (or even written a draft of) a Stooges adaptation of Pygmalion, which ended up as “Hoi Polloi.”
REVIEW:
If the dull new footage is proof, “Pies and Guys” is merely a cheap contractual obligation. For instance, virtually all of this Besser version’s finale is directly lifted as archived footage from “Half-Wit’s Holiday.” Symona Boniface’s presence is particularly awkward, considering she had passed away in 1950.
More so, aside from Larry & Moe’s amusing under-the-table hand-holding gag, the Besser-era footage indicates a cast merely going through the motions. As for Besser, given his lack of chemistry with Moe & Larry, the less said of his contributions the better.
The sole incentive for enduring “Pies and Guys” is fast-forwarding to the hilarious Larry-and-Moe pie-tossing festival – Larry: “You forgot to duck (hah, hah) — (seconds later) Moe: “So did you!”. Considering the tragic reason for this two-Stooge finish was Curly’s career-ending stroke, their vintage teamwork recycled twelve years later still packs some comedy dynamite.
To bleakly summarize how lazy and budget-stingy Columbia Pictures had become, this short abruptly ends as the pie fight starts winding down. White doesn’t even bother tacking on a new finish, even just to convey Besser was still in the ‘room.’ Watching the politically incorrect “Hoi Polloi” and/or “Half-Wit’s Holiday” obviously makes far more sense.
BRIAN’S ODD MOON RATING: 2 Stars
